It’s Okay Not to Have It All Figured Out: Real Talk for High Schoolers

By Jonathon Davis

High school feels like a countdown sometimes—four years to figure out who you are, what you want to do, and where you’re heading next. Between classes, tests, sports, and the pressure to “build your future,” it’s easy to feel like everyone else has a plan except you. Spoiler alert: they don’t.

Here’s what people don’t tell you—high school is less about having everything figured out and more about learning how to explore.

1. You Don’t Need to Have a Five-Year Plan

If you know exactly what you want to do, great. If you don’t, that’s perfectly fine. Most people change their minds—sometimes several times—before finding their path. Try things out. Take a class that sounds random. Join a club just because it looks fun. These “detours” often become the best parts of high school.

2. Failure Isn’t the End of the World

You’ll bomb a test. You’ll forget a presentation. You’ll have days when you just don’t want to try. That’s normal. What matters is how you bounce back. High school is the safest place to fail—it’s a learning zone, not a final score. Failure teaches resilience, which is something grades can’t measure.

3. Surround Yourself With People Who Lift You Up

Friends who cheer you on, even when you’re struggling, make all the difference. You don’t need a big group—just people who care. Stay close to those who make you laugh, push you to be better, and remind you of your worth.

4. Take Care of Yourself First

You can’t pour from an empty cup. Sleep, mental health, and small breaks matter more than cramming for hours. Go outside, move your body, journal, or just take a walk without your phone. Sometimes the best thing you can do for your grades is rest.

5. Do Things Because You Care—Not Because They “Look Good”

Colleges don’t want perfect robots with 20 clubs—they want real people. Do activities that actually excite you. If you love art, dive into it. If you like helping others, volunteer. Passion shows through more than padding ever will.

6. Talk to People You Admire

Teachers, older students, mentors—they’ve all been where you are. Ask them how they figured things out, what mistakes they made, or what they wish they knew in high school. You’ll be surprised how much people want to help when you just ask.

7. Remember: Growth Isn’t Always Visible

Some of the biggest changes happen quietly. Maybe you’re learning how to manage your time, speak up more, or just survive a tough class. Growth doesn’t always look like awards or grades—it’s often just you becoming a little stronger, a little more yourself.

8. The Little Moments Matter Most

The late-night FaceTimes, the random inside jokes, the small wins—they’re what you’ll remember. High school goes fast, so try to be present. You don’t have to make every day perfect—just notice the good parts before they pass.

Final Thought: High school isn’t a race or a checklist. It’s a time to experiment, mess up, and grow into who you’re meant to be. So take the pressure off. You don’t need to be extraordinary—you just need to be you, and that’s enough.